NTOO- Not The Only One!
Post # 21
” There Go I “!
I have on numerous occasions spoken of God’s sence of humor and sometimes it seems as if that is the only reason that I’m here, is for God’s enjoyment, and His fondness for snickering at me. Of course this is being said kind of tongue and cheek. I don’t believe that God is out to get me or us, just waiting for us to screw up, so He can zap us. Trust me, He knows how extremely dysfunctional we can be, and He still loves us in spite of that. However, there is something to be said for walking a mile in someone’s else’s shoes. I will put it that way, because when ever I do my best impression of the apostle Peter, which is constantly open mouth and insert foot 😀, God does seem to have away of getting my attention about it. It’s almost to the point now, where I feel as if God is saying, ” I dare you “. Again He is not saying that , but it comes down to our judgment of others, which He definitely says not to do. Psychologists tells us that most of us make a judgment on new people that we meet within the first two minutes and many times it takes us less time than that. And we all know how important it is to make a good first impression and how rare it is to get a second chance to do that. One of my favorites is to make a judgment call about someone’s actions, words, or motives and then have God to bring to mind rather quickly, that I have done the same thing or something very similar. Ok, quick example, I have made mention of Ms. Annomuis job hopping and I even went a step further and applied that to her personal relationship with men. Let me just first say that when it comes to relationships with women, I don’t have a leg to stand on. My track record isn’t the best, which I just pointed out a post or so ago. So, let’s get back to the professional side of things. I remember when I was working for myself, and all of the headaches and heartburn of taking on that responsibility. I probably complained way to much, ok, wasn’t a probably so much. Anyhow, my then wife had met this gentleman in her travels and they had formed a loose friendship, and he ended up offering me a job, which I took, but the money that we had discussed just wasn’t there, so I couldn’t stay there, and at the time he had a college aged son dealing with cancer, so I felt bad, but it just wasn’t going to work for me and the family. So I contacted an old friend who I knew from the “trade”, or market place, and explained my situation and he hooked me up with a job. It was the same thing that I had been doing when I was working for myself, but just not as much fun. So, shortly after that my path crossed with another old friend , from another job that I worked almost ten years prior. We chatted for a bit and I ended up going to work where he was employed and I was there for eighteen years, but the process of going from working for myself to the place I was at for eighteen years took place over less than four or five months. Yeah, I had completely forgotten about that until God gently reminded me of that, and sometimes not so much!. We generally like to think of ourselves as better than the people we are conveniently judging. Ok, so let’s get back to the original point of this post. I want to say that conviction can be a real bite in the ass. Ok, so this morning, while I attempting to get myself home, I stopped and got some fuel. The place I usually stop at is on a U.S route, so there is a fair amount of traffic, even in the early morning and overnight. So while I was getting fuel I was approached by this guy asking for money, and it seems to be an epidemic across America with people standing out with signs on corners and intersections, with all sorts of sad stories. Again, God says don’t judge, but honestly it’s hard not to. He introduced himself to me as Mike and gave me his spill. He said him and his old lady broke up and she kicked him out, and I’m not going to comment on that, but those were his words, not mine. I’m not heartless and this is far from being my first time approached at this location by different people. Having spent a little time in the army myself I have a weak spot when someone who says that they are a vet, but I also know that there is something known as stolen Valor and that is when people say that they have served and they have not, but you just never know and when I see women out , and if they have kids with them, it’s just absolutely is the worse. We are in the middle of what has become known as the ” great resignation”. It’s still a mystery to me as to how people are still able to stay out of work and just quit jobs because their egos were not stroked at work for them in the way that they thought it should be. And before I run off to far, if you do encounter actual veterans, the VA has some programs designed to get them help, in the form of housing and education ,and job placement, just wanting to make sure that those who have put on the uniform don’t fall to far beneath or between the cracks. I hope that it’s not too disrespectful, but I refer to these people as panhandlers. As I said before, everyone has a story and even when you take the time and do your best to try and figure out if they are legit or not, somehow you still feel as if they are getting over on you. We will double back to Mr. Mike in a bit. At the last church I use to be a member of, they had an outreach program that they did with the local food bank. It was called 2nd Saturday and they set up shop in this neighborhood, where a lot of the less fortunate reside, and they give out food. The people who show up would walk down a line setup by the church and they would get free groceries. We as the volunteers would walk with them with a wagon, and then help them to their car, or what ever mode of transport they had. Often as you were walking with them to their vehicle, they would share their story, and they were all different and many times not what you would expect. Sometimes you would get to know them by name, because you usually see the same individuals every month. Sometimes it’s a disabled family member or a neighbor. Sometimes they are trying to help out a grandparent who has young kids, because the adult in that child’s life is incarcerated. I remember this one lady, who had it all, she was highly educated, had at one point been a home owner and a six figure salary, and all of the niceties associated with that. She had the unfortunate problem of having hormones. She met this gentleman, no scratch that, she met a guy, and she was really smitten with him. When she finally got his attention, they went out one time and he introduced her to drugs, it just took that one time and she was hooked and basically lost everything. No more status, couldn’t keep a job, and a downward spiral consumed her life. And while it’s a sad story, it doesn’t excuse her from personal responsibility. She made a choices to get herself there, but we all do, just often we don’t look far enough a head to see the train on the track coming towards us with a full head of steam. We all do ,not so smart things at times, sometimes we get away with them and sometimes they leave us homeless and in a line to get free food.
Ok, but honestly I don’t have a solution here, and it often leaves me feeling extremely inept. I know people, some ” God fearing believers”, who would never dig in their pockets to help someone on the street. They will just say that the word of God says if you don’t work, then you don’t eat. Personally on some level I don’t have a problem with taking the hard line, but Jesus did feed people and He had compassion for them. This is another one of those areas with a big disconnect. How can so many people be out with signs asking for help, when every where you look there are help wanted signs . I know that it is a bit more complicated than the black and white we see. My curiosity really wants to know what these people drag in a day. It must have some dividends to it ,or so many people wouldn’t be doing it, so maybe to them this is their job, and it’s tax free money. 😀 I’m not trying to make light of it but I don’t get it, you obviously don’t have self respect, and there is an element of shame missing as well . I say that but I know that there are people who have real needs in their lives, but I also suspect that there is some portion playing the system and on good people’s conscious, about generosity to the less privileged. The problem is when someone approaches us we have no way of determining which is which. Now, some of those same people who I said would never dig in their pockets to help someone, they do support a ton of charities, and in an ideal world you would be able to connect the needy with those charities, but we know that life doesn’t always work exactly like that . Again I don’t have a solution here, but I would like some further understanding here, and again its a lot more complicated than I have time to dive into. One of the guys from my men’s group, also named Mike , encountered a needy person outside of a 7-11, and actually gave the man his coat because he was cold. I know we can not actually take them home with us, but there must be some compassionate solution out there, some where. I travel the same roads pretty much everyday, like most of us and see the same people out, every day. They have something that works for them, because they aren’t in the same clothes everyday, and I know from one of the guys in my men’s group, that they set up communities and co-op with others on some level. I know that some of them go to shelters at night but they have to go out during the day and look for work. I see them out in the elements, the heat and cold, and sometimes both in the same day. I don’t know what to do. I would love some feedback from you guys if you have some insight or experience with this. Giving money to charities is great and I fully support that, but when someone approaches you on the street, you can’t tell them that you gave money to a charity to help them out, well I guess you could, its just very hollow. I use to carry gift cards with me from McDonald’s or someplace else to make sure if they needed food, then they could something to eat. .I’ve also gone and brought them food and given it to them. I will be honest here and tell you that I don’t know if I’m being charitable or if I just don’t want to be made a fool of, by giving them money and they spend it on beer and cigarettes. Yes, we sometimes need to check ourselves and our motives, to make sure that our hearts are in the right place and that we aren’t giving ourselves an ego boost, for wanting to be seen as better or even something more devious, as to thinking that this should some how come back around to us in some form of a blessing. I have graduated, so I don’t know if it is a God thing or me deciding not to sweat the small stuff. And what I mean by that is, I know longer concern myself with what they will do with it after I give it. I give it in good faith, based on what they tell me, and the rest is between them and God. Relinquishing that helps some what, of feeling that you are being taken for a ride, but there is still some residual there, and maybe that says more about me and my lack of trust in people I encounter on the streets. Ok, let’s wrap this up and get back to my encounter with Mr. Mike. So , we are rapidly heading towards that cashless society that the Bible talks about, so yes, I have no cash on me. He directs me the ATM machine. He had a plan and it was kind of well rehearsed out. He told me that out of all the people he had approached that I was the only one even slightly considering to help him out. Ok, so I go inside the convenience store but ATM is down and if you buy something, they don’t do the whole cash back thing. So Mr. Mike was out of luck, and I didn’t have to feel as if I was being taken advantage of. I said I don’t concern myself with what they do with it, but I didn’t say that there wasn’t some internal struggle there. So I dodged a bullet of sorts, so I thought, but not so much! When I jumped in my truck to leave then , that dog on conviction thing kicked in, and that can be far worse than any stranger approaching you on the street. So now instead of a back and forth with Mr. Mike, God decides to pick up his case and is working on me. God said there is a bank a few miles up the street and I immediately said, I’m not doing that, first of all it’s inconvenient and out of my way . So , I’m driving and somehow I end up at the bank, no it wasn’t something magical where I was just transported there, it was me wrestling with God about it and the things He was saying to me. So I get some cash and head back over to where Mr. Mike had been. I get there and he’s gone , great I think to myself, I dodged another bullet, not so much again! God reminded me of early while we had been talking that he had mentioned to me that he was down the street at another convenience store and had no luck there, would you believe that God had me do a drive by that place. Yeah, you guessed it Mike was there, and I gave him the money. This hold thing wasn’t about Mike, it was about me being generous. Often our perspective is misaligned and we are looking outwardly and we should be looking inwardly. God is attempting to grow me spiritually, and I’m often being stubborn and or slow. I need to stop always thinking about how things are going to effect me whether it’s inconvenient or something completely different. I would probably be extremely embarrassed and made to feel extremely small about some of the things that are right before my very eyes that I miss every day. For those of you out there who love NCIS, yes the TV show, the main character on there, Jethro Gibbs, he has this thing where he slaps his subordinates in the back of the head, its not meant to be painful, more of a reminder to get your head in the game. The point here is that God and I have a very similar relationship and guess what? I’m not Jethro in this analogy. I’m not going to apologize for going a bit long, you should just expect that from here on out, and if I’m not, consider it a bonus 😀. Before I go, I just want to reiterate that if any of you have feedback about the homeless, panhandlers or how ever you think of them, I would appreciate you reaching out to me. Again it is one of these areas where I have way more questions than answers. I do believe that honestly if we aren’t a part of the solution, then we are part of what’s wrong with things. I called this one ” There Go I ” , because if not for the grace of God, any and all of us could find ourselves in a less than desirable situation, and if you think not, then you are sadly mistaken. Way to many stories of rags to riches , but it goes the other way as well. Just remember that lady that I encountered at 2nd Saturday, you may think never me, maybe not that scenario, but could you be one bad investment from loosing it all?
Till next time ✌️
Sandy The Southerner
