- Not The Only One !
- Post # 86
- 29 Jun 23
- Do You See , What I See !
- Howdy!
- Hey gang, I need to find something new to open with, but there is just something about consistency that applauds comfort, but I will give it some thought, in all fairness of keeping things fresh. Some of you guys may recognize this as a line from a very well known Christmas Carol. I’m not a person who is easily impressed, it’s just that few things catch me that way or surprises me. Whether it be something good , beautiful and kind, or something that just wreaks and screams of evil. There are things that can capture my attention and impress me, this may not be the best example, but I thoroughly enjoyed the sequel to “Top Gun”. It took them thirty years to get there, but the quality was there, which is so rare for those Hollywood types, chasing after our dollars.☺️☺️ The difference for me is that it’s something that I will remember and not feel the need to jettison, for lack of it taking up valuable brain space , and not being worthy of that. If by chance something or someone does impress me, I will be inclined to talk about it. I think that is just something in our wiring Or DNA , that prompts us to share, no matter what it is. How many times have you been out somewhere and let’s just say a restaurant, , or see a good movie, or perhaps it’s a book that we just can’t put down, can you not remember raving about the food, the movie or whatever, and most assuredly if the opposite was true and the service and or food, was not up to snuff. The word of mouth thing can be greatly impactful for the good, or the not so much! Word of mouth has both fueled careers as well as burned some down to the ground. I don’t want to call this one of my sidebars, but it is notable to say the least. For those of us who know God and have a personal relationship with God, and if God is God, and He has done so many amazing things in your heart, in your minds and your life, and the biggest coolest thing is providing forgiveness from your sins and salvation for your future, so, ,how and why are we not talking about Him, with each and every breath we breath . I’m willing to bet ,if it was about your favorite sports franchise, or some secret amazing family recipe, probably couldn’t shut you up about that, however we sit quietly by, instead of sharing about the greatest gift anyone has ever given to us. Just a thought, that’s all . I’m constantly talking about our perspectives and world views , and I whole heartily believes how we interact with others ,our beliefs systems about what is important, and on some level, how we see things in the world. I so admire, when I believe that people get it right. This is a small example , but with huge consequences and implications. Not long ago , LeBron James broke the scoring record of Kareem Abdul Jabar and when they asked him about it , he said if, I had the choice of having my scoring title stand for another hundred years or rolling around on the floor with his grandkids, the grandkids win hands down and every time. See, that’s perspective, someday someone else will eclipse LeBron, but no one can be a grandfather to Jarbar’s grandkids but him, and that is a memory that they will always carry with them, when No one will be able to remember anything about who holds the scoring title….perspective! I feel as if we all to often give way to much thought about what others think about us, how they view us, and allow ourselves to form , and be conformed by other people’s perceptions. I’m not immune to this myself, sometimes I loose focus and get it twisted as well. We are so much more than what other people think about us. We need to remember that we are always enough . They Peer in from the outside, never knowing where we have walked and the scars that we have acquired a long the way, it really is about the scars. Another way of looking at it is to view a tombstone. It has two dates on it, but the most important part, is the dash in between the two dates ,how did you and how much living was done in and with the dash. Life has this odd inverse dynamic of where the things that seem the most urgent and important, are usually not, and the things that seem simple or not as important are the things that we need to pay more attention to. An example of this may be that report that you had have ready for your boss at the end of the day, that made you miss your daughters ballet recital, or her first game pitching . There will always be reports due and for the most part, you will never be able to remember what they were for or about, but your little girl will always remember that you were absent from the bleachers or the audience. I want to speak to single parents for just a second and especially single moms. I have encountered time and time again moms who beat themselves up about working really hard to make ends meet and or to keep a roof over their kids head. I don’t know the circumstances that led you to being a single parent ,whether it be divorce, the unexpected death of a partner, or some other maybe not so thought out plan, and honestly it doesn’t matter. The important thing is that You did what needed to be done to stay a float. Sometimes that meant holding down more than one job, or sacrificing evening to go back to school to make yourself more marketable. You did the best that you knew how and you need to cut yourselves some slack. I know all to often that you guys lament over not being there for your kids and especially in their big moments in life. The truth is that You need to give yourselves some grace. It does us absolutely no good to play over and over again about the could have, should have syndrome. I believe that thought process takes away from the amazing accomplishments of what actually took place, when you sacrificed so many things, and not just your sleep, but maybe relationships and hobbies, and other aspects of life that went for the most part, unfulfilled. I’ve just encountered tons of people who have put their whole lives on hold until they got their kids raised and out of the house. And if you didn’t take that path, don’t beat yourself up about that either. There are no hard and fast rules about what is the correct path to take, I think that we need to find out what works for us, and that’s going to be a different stroke for different folks. I wasn’t raised by perfect parents and I sure as hell wasn’t a perfect parent to my kids, and whether I rachet it up forward to my kids and their parenting, or looking backwards for generations, there is just no such thing as a perfect parent outside of God and His first two kids kind of got it sideways as well. We look around and see other people’s kids soaring and grabbing life by the horns , graduating from college, getting married and off to chase the American dream, also known as kicking ass and taking names☺️☺️.And while it looks perfect from the outside ,we know that there is something that will challenge them, and if not crush and cripple them, will present them with a fair amount of challenges, because that is just how life goes. Sometimes looking around can leave us feeling less than adequate, or less than or some how insufficient. I don’t do this often but I’m going to recommend some reading material outside of this blog☺️☺️. The author is Nona Jones, and her work is called ” killing Comparison”. I get that it is often an involuntary reaction that we engage in, much like a sneeze, a yarn ,,or gas escaping our bows ☺️☺️,,but it has the ability to be debilitating,, and can project long-term effects, which often leads to depression . If there has ever been any one thing that needs to be put to death, then this is it. I sometimes like and encourage mental challenges to myself or my thought process about certain things. I’ve been on the record numerous times about the culture going in a certain direction and about people’s lack of commitment to specifically work ethic. We are almost a one eighty from the traditional nine to five thing. I want to blame some of this on covid, but not entirely. It is great and I’m all for people being able to work from home or remotely. It just has a huge upside and I’m not so much concerned about the adverse effects that some point to, but they are there, but I’m not going there. Ok, where exactly am I going? Don’t know that either ☺️☺️,,but someone pointed out to me ,what they referred to as the ” gig economy ” and you guys can feel completely free to beat me up about this one. This person’s experience or perspective was that kids of today or young people today are trying to fit their employment around their lives or other activities, and that takes precedent over the job. I’m all about family first, I mean after all, isn’t that the main reason for working in the first place? On a personal level, I like to know where I stand with someone or a situation, so I appreciate it when people let me know on the front end that they are not committed to the cause, or have a cat ☺️☺️. In my mind it tells me that they are not worth the investment of my time and resources . However , should I be rethinking my position on this one? I know that sometimes we are very much in pursuit of the same objective, but choosing different paths to get there. Perhaps I’m to hung up on the functionality of it all. I’m very familiar with the concept of teamwork and many organizations go way the hell out of the way to promote it, but I question its achievability, when people have a lack luster approach to the whole. This is more about the fragmentation of our society, aka , me first and foremost and the hell with everyone else. I mean we just see it every where, out in traffic, work, schools, and not just there. I was recently involved in a conversation with my son, who has no filter when it comes to the information that he consumes. So, he was talking to me about movie ratings and what gets a PG rating verses an R rating and he tells me that there is a limit on the number of expletives that are allowed and sometimes the cast members fights over who gets to say them as they come in for their close ups, I mean like really , ☺️☺️. I just question how do you build anything with half hearted participants. I think across the gambit of marriages , homes, families ,any other relationships and definitely organizations, such as a business or charities without people who are committed to it. I can sit back on my high horse and watch some high priced athlete sit out and demand more money or a contract redo, when they are already making more money than ninety-five percent of people will ever get to see over their entire life time and say, that is selfish. I don’t believe that they have anyone’s else interest at heart but their own . Forget about the fans, those products that support them through advertising and they definitely are not about their team mates who take the field or court with them week in and week out. I get that there is the possibility of injury ,but if you feel that strongly about it, then do the honorable thing and walk away like Andrew Luck and others have done, instead of holding the rest of us hostage . I feel very much the same about it in the work force. I’m there because I have a mortgage and kids to support and Your willingness to come along side and partner with me is determined by whether you have money for beer and cigarettes and let’s not forget door dash and Uber eats☺️☺️., and let’s not forget about our pot allowance ,gotta have pot ,its getting to be more essential than food. ☺️☺️ Is it a gig economy or a dabble economy. I do a little this and a little that, but no planning for the future. Isn’t that the perfect recipe for ensuring that one day you will be living under a bridge?, I don’t know, I’m just asking. On the surface, it is great !, like let’s just work less, but where is the line between being responsible and the other thing that we are doing, whatever that is? Do you see what I see ,or do you see the potential for something good to come out of this? I don’t want to be chicken little with the sky is falling, and not all about gloom and doom, but I’m not going to wake up some morning and cry in my cereal when we see that there is an even bigger divide between the haves and the have nots. Maybe we need to get away from the work hard, save and play hard, and the traditional planning, but all to often we want to tear down and or replace a system, when we don’t have anything else or a clear idea of what is next . I think to the stock market, it has its ups and downs, but consistently over the long run, it usually pays out and the majority don’t loose their shirts. ☺️☺️. I’m probably not the most optimistic, when I think about the future or see what maybe coming down the the pipe . My son again, in his infinite wisdom, says that one of the worse crimes there is in life is to point out a problem in life and not have one single suggestion about how to make things better, because then you become part of the problem by making it more well known . Again, no filter and I’m not saying that I agree with that, but it has a ring of truth to it. I’m a traditionalist, so for me it’s about God, Family, Country and maybe occasionally guns☺️☺️,,but I don’t see how this ” gig economy ” benefits any of those things. The working of part time jobs of running pizzas, dog walking, and yes being a cabby use to be a supplement or a stepping stone on to a career and not actually the career itself ☺️☺️. I would love to hear from You guys and tell me what you see, when looking into the future and would love your thoughts on the gig economy and people choosing just to do enough to get by and I mean sometimes, just to the next day.☺️☺️ If I have just one suggestion, it would be let be traditional ☺️☺️.
- Till next time ✌️Peace !
- Sandy The Southerner
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