NTOO= NOT THE ONLY ONE

Post#7

Wrong place and time !

When I  was seventeen,  I  learned a very painful lesson about not being where I  was supposed to be. Since I  was seventeen we can rule out me leaving someone at the alter do to cold feet. However as teenagers we think that we are clever and have all of the answers and I was no exception.  Thumbnail sketch looks like , I  had my mom’s car and told her that I was going to do a  specific thing, but I actually had other plans,,big surprise right? Well since I  knew better than just to straight out lie to her, I  did do a pop in to the place that I said I was  going,,however is was extremely brief,  just so someone could say they saw my face. Alibi covered,  checked that box. And probably by this point it would not surprise you that a girl was involved,, and not just any girl, but a cheerleader. Well, the jist of it is that I was at her house, and for some reason we were in the car for a couple of hours, with it running and the air conditioning on. Well after her mom had flick the porch  lights off an on for an inordinate amount of times,  I cut the car off and walked her to the door, because that is what I was trained to do.  Guess what did not start back up after that good night kiss, yep you got it, my mom’s late model Chevy. I was unaware that you could kill a battery like that in the summer time. Well I’m not superstitious , but this was a Friday the 13th, not superstitious because I was born on a Friday the 13th, and it had kinda always worked out for me,  but not so much  this time.  It gets rich because for weeks my mother had been nagging me about taking the triple A card off of the mantle and putting it in my wallet.  Needless to say, everyone in her neighborhood tried to jump that car to no avail. This meant that the moment of truth had come and unfortunately it was 2am in the morning by now, definitely didn’t want to make that call to the parents. The young lady’s mom was not a fan of mine, and I definitely didn’t earn any bonus points that night.  I was raised with the understanding of to stay away from fights , fires, and crowds,,and for the most part,  it had served me well.  But hear I find myself some forty years later, scratch that forty-five years later in the wrong place at the wrong time.  This time it may have cost me so much more than just the embarrassment of having to wake up the parents at a wierd hour. I have never claimed to be a Saint,  actually quite the opposite of that.  Sometimes when we try to do the right thing , we still get penalized for it. I over stayed my welcome in a relationship which had long gone pass its expiration date. There was a teenage girl in the picture and she desperately needed the support of a two parent dynamic.  I’m not saying that I was the ideal candidate for this, but I did have a hand in raising my daughter and with the grace of God, she turned out pretty terrific. I  found myself grappling with things that I had never dealt with ,while raising my kids, and I  had no reference for it while I was growing up either.  I’m kinda old school and I before warned you that I’m not a PC person. I loved this kid more than I  ever did her mom. Kids just sometimes find a way of worming thier way into your heart and that is exactly what happened here.  Without going into great detail, I  was totally ill prepared to deal with  thoughts  of suicide and gender identity crisis.  I’m not sure that it was helpful for a young teenage girl to  have her biological father to be going thru gender  reassignment  himself. I  thought that to be odd for a person in thier forties,but I  had gotten involved with his ex-wife,  so maybe…could see it.  They did a number on the kid and on top of all of that they did this polyamorious thing,  which is what I thought was people being swingers. I think the concept is the same, but they window dress it differently, they want to have an open marriage and to make themselves feel better about it, its not just a physical thing,  but supposedly has  feelings involved. I probably have gone on to far here, and I’m not trying to paint them as awful people,  but to more so show how much they damage thier one and only kid. As I said before,  I’m no one’s Saint, while I tried to add a little bit of stability. I  stayed with her mother under false pretenses , but that is not actually true,  because she always corralled me about being there just for the kid and not for her. It was a very strange and stressful time for me.  And here is the kicker, when the one and true most amazing woman comes along , I  get flagged for a little overlap. I can’t imagine what she thinks of me because we have had an amazing year together but she wants to go back and say that I was unfaithful to her, when that absolutely did not happen.  I gave this woman the keys to the Farrai.  I  don’t actually own a Farrai, symbolism for my heart. I  was just getting to a good place,  the kid was graduating high school and heading of to college,  and I was supposed to be in the clear. Again,  I’m not a Saint, but I  would just assume to some how tragically injure myself before I  would hurt this woman.  I  love her and we are a really good fit, and I  felt as if she was someone that I could love for the rest of my days. I  wasn’t prepared to throw the teenager away,  but now it has possibly cost me, maybe my last chance at true love , and I’m not being dramatic or over stating the condition of my heart at this point. Sometimes we have to do the right thing,  even if we know that it will  cost us something,  and sometimes the price is high.

Until next time✌

Sandy the Southerner

Sent from my T-Mobile 4G LTE Device

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